April 26, 2018
by Doug “Uncola” Lynn:
If I were the devil, I would desire the most efficient system of governance whereby maximum control could be exerted over the greatest amount of people at any given time. I would identify those who stood in my way and take them down either by force or subversion. There would be no room in my world for individuality, free thought, or vain imaginings of anything, or anyone, more powerful than me. As an orchestrator of chaos, the only unity I could tolerate would be that which served both my means and ends.
Without a doubt, divide and conquer would be my means and one world under me would be my objective.
I would use my power to threaten, coerce, blackmail, and subjugate those under my command; to harness them on the way toward my ultimate goal of total world dominion. The loyal ones would reap rewards of preeminent prestige, privilege, and perverted pleasures. The traitors to my cause would suffer lawsuits, investigations, poverty, public humiliations, torture, or death. Deception would be my modus operandi and confusion would serve me well; as long as I remained ever in the know with billions of eyes continually watching and one eye always on the final destination.
I would stamp out truth and label it by other names. Facts would become fake and vice versa. I would cover the eyes and ears of my minions to shield them from all except my own reality; until their collective voices became one with mine. Comprehensive consensus would appear universal as dissent would be quelled and free speech quashed. Language would be utilized to affect thought and to establish the ideological premises for whatever conclusions I required.
Soon, words and concepts would come to mean the very opposite of what they once meant.
Thus, diversity would actually mean unity, tolerance would manifest as intolerance, affordable would become expensive, and Departments of War would be transformed into Departments of Defense that would make military strikes labeled as surgical and causing damage that was collateral.
Of course any newly-spawned and continuously altered ideologies would, in turn, be utilized to inaugurate mandated orthodoxies intended to benefit me first and foremost.
Like a snake swallowing itself, I would feed my people and they would feed me. All for one and one for all. From each according to their ability, to each according to their needs.
In a realm of electronic lights and sparkling colors, optics would become paramount; smoke and mirrors, imperative. These would be utilized, like holographic clowns, to guide humanity into my funhouse where they would all righteously point their fingers at illusory scapegoats for things they, themselves, have done; or not done. The people would encircle each other in a maze of bubbles and distorted visions, while snarling and cursing one another.
All of the fresh frontiers would be closed and gutted like anchor stores in a death mall.
It would be my way or no way at all.
In the end, however, my people would find my gift shop and beyond that, the circus; where I would stand in the middle of the center ring, laughing, and enjoying the applause.
“Behold what is new and forego the old”, I would say.
“Marvel at my efficiencies of digital algorithms, and data sets, and my avant-garde system of credits under the twin tent-poles of global taxation and sustainable development. See Gaia dance; bow before her now. Isn’t she lovely? Behold the beauty of the technological transhumanists, and the twirling transgendered, as the aliens from outer space explode from the cannons.”
“Am I man or beast?”, I would tease them with a grin before my boots would stamp upon their faces, forever. For it was written into papyrus, paper, stone, and the stars; though most knew I was never here.
Would the tears in their eyes come from laughing, gratitude, fear, grief, or rage?
It would make no difference to me. That would be their choice.